Women, some Girl Talk

Why do I have to wear short shorts and my bandmates get to wear pants? I'm kinda cold.

Last week I went to see the band Women and was struck by something odd. It wasn’t how good they were—it was my second time seeing them and there was gratuitous guitar wanking, inaudible vocals, and not much else. No, looking up through my PBR colored glasses at the stage I saw Women—but they weren’t women, like the people with boobs, they were Canadian dudes! Not only was there not a single woman on stage, looking around I only saw a handful of us in our best skinny jeans.

I wondered where are the ladies? Furthermore, what’s the deal with all these all- male indie rock bands with female band names?

First, every show I’ve been to lately is a complete dude storm—in both band and crowd. Now, I love a cute bro in glasses just as the next broad, but where are all the women at shows? Perhaps I’m in the wrong city or maybe we just don’t care about music and prefer to at home cooking dinner and making babies.

Maybe I’m being an “uppity bitch” but c’mon: Women, Girls, Girl Talk, Twin Sister, Communist Daughter, etc. A few years back, it was totally trendy to name a band after a woodland creature—Fleet Floxes, Grizzly Bear, Deeranything. But now you cannot get onto Pitchfork unless your band name is the Girly Girls and the lil’ Twin Bitch Sisters.

Is it satirical for a band of bros to call themselves Girls or Women? Like, ha! ha! we’re a bunch of dudes so it would be totally ironic to call ourselves something girly!!

I probably wouldn’t be so annoyed if I thought that popular indie rock was overflowing with female artists and those artists were respected and taken seriously. When female artists are buzzed about, it’s often not about the music. Kyle Forester of Crystal Stilts recently commented on this gender dichotomy on Pitchfork saying, “People love girls in bands, but they want to write lewd shit about them on Brooklyn Vegan. It is weird that the indie rock world is supposed to be politically progressive, but in terms of gender politics, it's sort of like 'Mad Men'.”
(you needn’t look further than Death Cab for Cutie sad sack Ben Gibbard to realize that, in music, the same attractiveness standards DO NOT apply for men and women. His wife's pretty hot though!)

There are a lot of awesome women in indie rock right now, but the bands that are the most blogged about are either a bunch of dudes with a lady name or a bunch of dudes with some sort of hot, maybe gimmicky female lead singer. For example, the New York based band Twin Sister; the band consists of five members- and the one girl is the vocalist. She has a “quirky” voice, conveniently contributing to the band’s sleepy, bedroom “dream pop”. I know little of Twin Sister’s background but the aforementioned uppity bitch in me suspects the lead vocalist was shoved in front of a microphone because she was hot in that indie-bangs-and-arm-tattoo kind of way and could sing. And behold! In an internet minute, Twin Sister’s album Color Your Life was given a 7.5 by Pitchfork.

Twin Sister and their lead lady are blowin’ up on the blogosphere, but they aren’t the only one with a strategically placed female lead singer. I saw the Brooklyn-and-blog based band Cults sometime in the late summer. Listening to Cults before seeing them live, the vocals sounded like they belonged to that of a 6-year old (and I loved it, by the way). I wasn’t far off. The lead singer looked about 19. Her voice is very twee and childlike and for Cults, it works well. But watching her fronting an all bro band, singing and sweetly swaying in front of an almost exclusively all male crowd, I was unsettled. (It should also be mentioned that one of Cults’ band members commented on the lack of women in the audience. sorry you couldn’t see me. I was in the back drinking beer.)

Don’t get it twisted—I love female vocalists. But with a new Brooklyn buzz band cranking out an MP3 a minute, it seems like cute female vocalists are a commodity for success—or at least a blurb on a blog.

There are women in indie rock. A lot of them. But women's music is often gendered- passed off as being sentimental or juvenile. Neil Young was taken more seriously than Joan Baez as an antiwar musician. I know a lot of women who are willing to admit they love Bob Dylan and I can’t say the same for men and Joni Michell. Today, Joanna Newsom, a probable genius, was at first passed off as being nymph-like with a childlike voice. Meanwhile, her 'freak folk' compatriot Devendra Banhart was touted as world-weary and wise. From politics to sports to media to indie rock, women’s accomplishments are often quantified, where man’s are simply accepted verbatim.

When I was doing DJ training for my college radio station a year ago, one of the (female) senior members of the station said to me, “It’s nice to see some ladies here”. Yeah, is refreshing to see actual Women, Girls, Sisters, and Daughters doing the Girl Talk and playing music.

Here are some talented bitches, Mountain Man. Get it? Ha! Ha!

Things That Are Good

...Little kiddies dancing outside of your radio show as you play Beirut.

So Gay For: Lissie/Tequila Swigging Ladies

What do you get when you cross a Kid Cudi song, a badass lady, tequila, beers, plus a few bearded men for good measure? My wet dream, that's what! My friend Josh gave me a heads up about this artist, a tequila swigging lassie named Lissie (and he's a lifeguard, so you should trust him).

makeout music.

-by someone who makes out more than you do.

Here's some music you should be making out to:

"When I'm Small" -Phantogram

This song is from August 2009, which means it's not new. But it's new to me. And this is for people who are making out, not music snobs. And in my experience they are not the same people.

Ding Dong Special: The World Cup

We hardly knew ye tight buns, Glen.


Hey Sports Fans! It's the most wonderful time of year. Or, I should say, it is the most wonderful time of every four years. It's the World Cup, yallz!

I love sports (as long as they're not terribly American or boring like football or basketball). As the daughter of a hockey coach and the sister of a brother who once asked about a boy, "Does he even play sports?", playing sports was just expected of me. I'll be the first to admit I haven't played soccer since the Clinton Administration (full disclosure: when my family moved from Long Island to Pennsylvania when I was 11, I quit soccer. In PA, the tween teams were coed and I really hated playing with aggressive wanking-off tween boys. I also wanted to play tennis so I could wear a skirt, which is really beside the point). But the World Cup is all sorts of international fun. It's like the Olympics but without the bullshit sports like archery. It's thrilling and kinda cool that the whole world is caught up in well-thighed men kicking around a ball.

Here's the problem: I have no idea who to blow my vuvuzela at in the World Cup. I usually like to pick a side and get my jollies off arguing in their defense. This is not a problem with other sports:
Tennis: Serena Williams, badass & a babe. Rafael Nadal, badass & a babe.
Hockey: Detroit Red Wings, for my pops.
Skiing (yeah): Bode Miller, badass babe from New Hampshire.
Baseball: Kinda too boring to care but I guess the Mets or the Phillies.

I guess it should be obvious that as an American, I should root for the U.S. of A. Before they were knocked out by Ghana on Saturday, I still could not root, root, root for the home team. Before I'm called a turncoat (or whatever the post-18th Century equivalent for that term is), lemme explain: like Kayne said George Bush doesn't care about black people, the U.S. doesn't care about soccer. First, we call it soccer when the rest of the world calls it football. We think the games are too long. We think the men aren't manly enough. We'd rather watch American football or So You Think You Can Dance? The rest of the world is wacky about soccer and they play it from Slovakia to the Ivory Coast to South Korea. It's pretty neat.

Instead of rooting for these purple mountain majesties, I've found arbitrary reasons to root for other countries. First, it was England. I love all things English (Harry Potter. Nigella Lawson. Tea. Wellies, houndstooth, & cable-knit. Fog & rain. Colour, not color.) and, I fell madly in lust with jolly good sexy English defender, Glen Johnson (see above). England lost to the cold machinery of the Germans and now I'm lost without a team. Do I root for Spain because I experienced my first (and only) discothèque in Madrid? Or Ghana because Africa could use some happy news? Or Slovekia because who the hell knew they played soccer? Or Brazil cos they'll prollz win?

Here's the solution: I'll do what everyone assumes the ladies do anyway - ogled the players buns and pick a favorite that way. Thus, making this the World Cup Ding Dong Special.

We'll start with Spain first. The Spaniards just kicked Portugal and Ronaldo's well-coiffed ass with the help of this sexy hombre, Sergio Ramos. The locks, the abs, the name, Sergio. You're welcome. This international celebration of sport and the illin' hotties that play it goes on well into July, so it's going to be a hot month.

So Gay For: Sleigh Bells/Alexis Krauss

In a new segment on The Revolution Will Be, "So Gay For" will exhibit girl crushes and things I think are really neat. To qualify as a girl crush, a lady must be a ballin' badass babe. And things I think are really neat must be just that.

To start us off we have my favorite band du jour...but for, like, a couple months...Sleigh Bells and it's ballin badass babe front woman, Alexis Krauss. Sleigh Bells is a Brooklyn band creation of its instrumentalist and songwriter, Derek Miller. Both Florida natives, Miller and Krauss hooked up and headed north. Miller, who used to be in a hardcore band, creates heavy guitar riffs that are lightened by Alexis Krauss, who is able to keep it rough but sweet. It's Krauss' heavy breathing, singing, and screaming that makes Sleigh Bells one of the tightest new bands in 2k10.

And it's her killer bangs, arm tats, and shiny pants that makes her my absolute girl crush.

You'll hate yourself if you don't check them out:
http://www.myspace.com/sleighbellsmusic
(esp. "Rill Rill" and "Crown on the Ground")

Millenium Falcon Ding Dong

Han Solo: Angry, in a v-neck. Can't ask for anything more, really.

(It's my time honored start-of-summer tradition to watch Star Wars. Harrison Ford is a perk.)

Somethings last a long time

to sunsets near & far
for somethings last a long time

Baller of the Week

Ballin' Iranian woman.

ladies

next year will mark the 100 year anniversary of international women's day. this is a tribute to the amazing ladies in my/our lives.

Wine-blogging with too much wine

Dedicated Readers (?),

My Live Wine-blogging of the Academy Awards was cut short because I 1.) had too much wine and 2.) it is largely considered rude to be typing away on your glowing laptop when you have guests over to watch the Academy Awards.

Anyway, I had so much to say about celebrities, as I often do, but they were saved for people "IRL" (in real life, apparently). I'm pretty sure I deserve a real celebrity blog, to be honest. However, I might have a higher calling (RU there god? It's me, Elsa) and I think that everyone on "the internet" thinks they deserve a celebrity blog (or their version of such).

In short, the Oscars sucked. Sandra Bullock seems like a fun gal to get a beer with, but not an Oscar nominee, let alone a winner! (People thought George Bush would be a good guy to get an beer with (he's an alcoholic) and he was president for 8 years. These are strange times we're living in, readers.)

Congratulations to Kathryn Bigelow for being the first woman to ever win an Oscar for Directing. Hopefully this will encourage female filmmakers and will discourage James "Jim" Cameron from ever making another again.

My award from Best Sexiest Man goes to Jeff Bridges. A fine wine, that man is. Best Lady I'm Currently Obsessed With goes to Carey Mulligan. Her hair! Her Britishness! Her Shia LeBouf!

Otherwise, the Oscars were too flippin' long. Get a grip, Hollywood.

8:30

ZOMG it's starting. Why does the set look like it's from 1986?

8:32

Dougie Houser is sooooo g.

8:24

Maybe I'm being sensitive, but this seems pretty inspired by Lady Gaga.

8:20
Tina Fey is sooooo normal and kewl.

8:22
I would marry Jeff Bridges and/or The Dude tomorrow.

8:24
Kate Winslet is The Woman. Why did the interviewer ask her if her kids would go into acting? Aren't they 3? They're probably going into kindergarten.

8:19

Whoopi Goldberg in an adult diaper commercials. lololololol. Whoa, baby boomers, huh?

8:13
Is Jennifer "Jenny from teh bloxxx" still relevant?

Wine-blogging the 382nd Academy Awards

Hey Glamour Gals (and guys?) and drunks. Welcome to my live wine-blogging of the 82nd Academy Awards. Since we can't be together, I've decided to blog with a bottle of Cab Sav (is allllwaaaays fab!) We'll see how long this lasts...

8:07
Penelope Cruz can't speak English. To quote paraphrase Emily, she looks like a ferret.

Have one on [us]

I wish we could take every path.
I could spend a hundred years adoring you.
Yes, I wish we could take every path,
because I hated to close the door on you.

Joanna Newsom, Baby Birch

Happy Birthday, Sara!

exactly what we need.

I implore you to watch this very twee short film with the adorable Jason Schwartzman and Kirsten Dunst. You know I have less that warm n' fuzzy feelings towards Dunst (her je ne sais quoi bothers me) but I found anything hard to hate about this film. Aside from the fact that I'm not in the indie in-crowd in L.A. The film is meant to promote a new clothing line Opening Ceremony. It worked--the clothing is covetable. The film is cute.

non plus one final from Tracy ANTONOPOULOS on Vimeo.

(I promise to actually write something soon)

New Moon Mornings

Dedicated this to yallz this morning on my radio show. With giggles, coffee, revolution, and, duh, love.

(& as a matter of interest, check out Yeasayer's new album, Odd Blood. soo good)

Open Your Heart

For you

Love, me

Phoenix - 1901 - A Take Away Show from La Blogotheque on Vimeo.

I'm Your Biggest Fan

A couple Sunday nights ago, I watched the Grammys for the first time since I thought the Backstreet Boys was quality music and thought the Grammys meant something. As I watched celebrities faun over themselves and pantless women prance, there was something that really bothered me about the awards. It wasn't the fact that there wasn't actually any good music up for nomination (that's another post entirely). What bothered me is that the Fame Monster, Lady Gaga, was almost entirely shut out of the Grammys while teen ingenue Taylor Swift walked away with America's hearts and the coveted Album of the Year. In what world is a woman who has reinvented pop music defeated by a girl who laments tween heartbreak?

I'll let you read my poker face right off the bat: I am a huge Lady Gaga fan. I think she's a brilliant entertainer whose made made pop music interesting again. She walks the line of being a "Fame Monster", courting the media in her fanciful Haute Couture, all the while not caring what anyone aside from her fans think of her theatrics.

Before the Grammys, I'd never seen Taylor Swift perform and really knew nothing of her, aside from knowing that her personal brand is lapped up by everyone from tween girls and their moms; college dudes; and country music fans alike. Apparently, American is titillated by Taylor.

She certainly fits the "America's Sweetheart" profile: she's young and looks younger. She's thin and blond. She's from America's heartland. She writes harmlessly catchy tunes. And although Ryan Seacrest blew his teen-girl load while introducing her during the Grammys (basically stating she's the Greatest Song Writer of Our Time), her songs such as "Fifteen" aren't exactly the next "Blowing in the Wind".

I don't really give a toss about Ms. Swift. But I do care about the underlying implications of Swift's victory over Lady Gaga at the Grammys.

They do share a few commonalities: they're both thin and blond (though Gaga's hair color is as ever changing as My Little Pony's). They both write their own music and both play an instrument. They're both in constant rotation on Top 40 radio. But the similarities pretty much end there.

Swift, with her twee lyrics and "Who me?" demure, appeals largely to Conservative America. I'm sure she comes from a "Family values" background and is known for dating good Christian boys.

Lady Gaga, grabbing her crotch and singing about sex with men and women, is a pop star for Liberal America. Widely considered a gay icon, Madame Gaga appeals largely to women and gay men. She is on all accounts a strong woman; making no qualms for 'freakish' performances; her fashion choices; and her meticulous attention to detail.

There is nothing wrong with different representations of women in the media. What is disconcerting is the mainstream's fetishization of Swift and the villaininization of Gaga. Swift is idolized by girls and lusted after by men for being the Madonna, the unattainable virgin. Lady Gaga is the villainous whore, courted by ultimately feared. The mainstream is so intimated by Gaga that there was a "legitimate" rumour about Lady Gaga having a penis (Google "Lady Gaga" and the first thing to pop up in the search browser is "Lady Gaga Hermaphrodite). Yes, because she is a strong woman in control of her career and sexuality, Lady Gaga must have a penis. Who else could have such control but a man?

Taylor Swift's popularity largely hinges on her ability to play the sweet, yet sexy, girl next door. It'll be interesting to see if her popularity can sustain as she transcends into womanhood (she is, in fact, already 20-years old).

For now, Swift is America's girl next door. She embodies what we expect women to be: sweet, naive, virginal, and of course, beautiful. She's not like those women who speak their mind; change the way we view gender; and who are free bitch(es), baby.

Ding Dong [Alt-Rock Edition]

Ladies and...er, ladies...Nathan Followill of Kings of Leon. Nathan is the drummer and oldest bro of the Kings of Leon, the alt rock band from Tennessee turned recent Grammy winners. Out of all of the Followill bros Nathan is decidedly the sexiest of the bunch. Flowing locks, sexy specs, and arm tats. Use somebody, indeed.

Liveblog of Elsa's Show!

...from when I tuned in.

totally LOVED BSS and Cat P. miss u 2005! that was a good year for alternative tunes, before the scene like "blew up." also, cant find my bss album. do you have it?

coco rosie is like, ok (ie boring and dumb), and "by your side" song blows. shine shoes? fuck that. just saying. prollz just jealz that one of those broadz was boning Dev for a while.
also hilarious (?) that you played a PSA for anti-women-abuse after that song ("I'll wear your black eyes.") I think cocorosie were being "ironic" or they are "dumb bitches."

9:58 yr voice is sexy! i want a ride on the ride board!

10:00 johanna! guh huh! i was young once.
"all day long we talk about mercy/ lead me to water lord i sure am thirsty." holy fuck.

10:06 havent heard the justin timberghey version of Halleululiah. yet and i never will. i will never cave to that guy's existence. still like the rufus wainwright version the best besides Leo's.

10:12: billy bragg. dUUUUHHHH. can't listen to this song without thinking of Merez, and how she loves the line "is it wrong to wish on space hardware/ i wish i wish i wish you cared." also reminds me us driving out to VT with Dad and he really liked it, like the line about other girls pushing prams. he did that "aw" thing. That's the trip I read harry potter 5 outloud, at the hight of my hagrid voice capabilities.

10:14 this sounds like first wave alt core. smiths or something? british ppl r sad. [oh that was my request! Brian Jonestown Massacre. that totally blew. sorry, your fans.]

10:19: i like this! helsinki-esque. [oh it was arcade fire. miss u buzzbands

10:27: you talk kinda quiet! cant hear!

10:30: love you FFoxez. wonder when the FF "backlash" will start and we will uncover that they used to be a ska band/sons of CEOs. Wonder if they will "beat the sophomore slump" or sell the rights of their songs to kidz bop.

10:41: guh huh! Keh'ssong! about meeeeeeeeee! reminds me of "being young." it was lovely, and kel's music is a revelation, and you can listen to all of it here:

10:46: more downbeat winterindie core. seems appropriate. [port obrien! they are waaay different live, like loud and siiiiick.]

10:50: omg beachhouse. sounds like a very long winter and a very melodramatic heartbreak! the human experience on a good day.

10:55: more BH. victoria legrand: genius, the biggest baller in the room. beachouse has defined the modern soundtrack to the experience of love.

10:59: yeah library PSA! your mother would be proud.

11:00: quirky voiced post-regina broad with acordian. nice. sux to be a woman in the music biz cause you are just a "woman in the music biz." unless you're cat power/victoria legrand/joanna newsom/MIA.

11:06: talk louder, broad.

11:11: le loup! forgive me! this song could power a train. one of those rare songs that could qualify for "heartbeat of a generation." or whatever.

11:16: dancy post-ipod-commercial janglecore followed by kinda slow, relationship-endingcore.

11:23: raucous. THATS WHAT IM TALKIN ABOUT. boogie boarder. tight.

11:27: if i was some lil indie bro I would have a HUGE crush on you.

11: 31: dreams come true girl. like it. Love Cass McCombs, but he's a lot better when he's not trying to be buddy holly. PREfection is better.

11:34: FF knock off with smaller vocals?

11:43: I will never understand Vampire Weekend. because they "suck." is this a vinyl played too fast? It sounds like shit. acutally, i've taken shits that sound more relevant than this.

11:49: whoa. anco? perfect, as always. think they've kinda "reinvented music."

k, i'm having lunch. will be sure to tune in next time!

love, your biggest fan (but not VaWe's)

heeey ladies

I've been digging Au Revoir Simone for a couple of months but really fell in <3 when I saw this video for their song "Sad Song". I found myself really "relating" to their cookie baking, lil dresses, and their attempt to have a dance party (not to mention, the bangs!) But in the end, life is just about synthesizers and having a dance party with your ladies. I suspect you can relate.

clinton era ding dong

jordan catalano, circa 1994.

vintage ding dong

Ding dong it's been too long!

Lindsay Buckingham (of Fleetwood Mac)